Happy – Sad Smile – Frown Good – Evil Calm – Angry Alive – Dead Good – naughty, bad, terrible, horrible, wicked, dastardly… Who would have thought that one of the biggest challenges faced during the Christmas period, would have been to decide how best we should approach a seemingly unending list of human emotions and traits – whilst watching a cartoon movie. I was looking forward to a Christmas spent watching films with Lauren, growing as she is – able to maintain enough of an attention span to sit through one of the many Disney classics. You will then understand my disappointment when the Disney Movie Channel was being rather selective – read: they want your money – in which classic movies they showed:
Lauren Archive
Belief. It’s a strange thing to explain to people. A sense of knowledge and understanding that comes solely from within – even if it is passed down through the ages. Only you can believe. Only you have the power to believe. Christmas is an interesting time when you have a young child. There are a number of messages – factual and make believe – that we, as adults, have the option to decide whether we play out in front of our children. There is the role of the saviour of mankind – and then there is the jolly, cheery gift bringer. One will forgive you of your sins, whilst the other will log your misdemeanours on a list and use them against you. One transcends
A trigger is a strange thing. In terms of my anxiety, a trigger could be a simple thing that I would manage, deal with and move past for weeks on end. Then, out of nowhere; that simple thing would blow up. Become a hard to manage, impossible to pass situation – that I simply had no way to counter. The granddaddy of all triggers for me is failure. Of course you can easily throw in a soupcon of rejection, a dash of change, a mere morsel of overloading – but in the end it all comes back to one thing – the fear of failure. Episode one, as we will call it to keep things simple – was as much to do with overloading as
I swear. I swear a lot. I can never remember if it is like a docker, a trooper, a fox or a pig. Either way, it is something I do on a regular basis. Or at least I once did. Have a baby and everyone with or without a kid will instantly tell you that your life is about to change. What they don’t tell you is that, rather than the social, working or sporting side of your life – all of which you can just about manage to keep a hold of in some part – it is your mannerisms that change the most. Before Lauren was born, I’d regularly call friends a ‘knobber’ – within reason, as in they had acted like one.